Chick-fil-a is under new management! After previously being owned by Dan Cathy, the former family business has been sold to Moses Rubenstein. Rubenstein is a devout Jewish man who is eager to makes changes to improve an already successful fast food chain. His first action as owner was to open up the restaurant on Sunday. This move has generated tons of positive responses from chicken lovers all over the world. Chris Tian, a local pastor, said, “I am thrilled to finally be able to appease my chicken cravings that I get during every church service.” In addition, it is confirmed that Chick-fil-a will be open on both Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. However, they will also close 18 minutes before sunset on Friday to observe Shabbat and reopen whenever they feel is necessary. Due to the abundance of Jewish holidays, they will also be closed at least twice a week.
The recipe is also going through some significant changes. Chick-fil-a is getting rid of their buttery, heart-attack-inducing bread and biscuits. The now classic chicken will be served on an authentic, traditional Jewish bagel. Rubenstein wants to make the menu more diverse by including sandwiches with all different bagel flavors. These include classics like plain, everything and onion to more complex flavors like cinnamon raisin, blueberry pancake, black cherry and birthday cake. The pickles on the sandwich will also be discarded. In its place will be gefilte fish. None of the reporters know what this actually is, but it definitely seems a little fishy. No matter our doubts, Rubenstein has guaranteed that he has taken three culinary classes at his Hebrew school, making him an expert in the restaurant business. Chick-fil-a has also created a wide variety of unique side dishes. They include matzah brei, matzo balls, matzah will charoset, and just straight up matzah. The Chick-fil-a sauce will remain on the menu because no one in their right mind would want to change that.
The final change that they will be making is upgrading their beloved cow mascot. Rubenstein does not want to remove the cow as the mascot, as he is a firm believer in their rights as animals and their demand for equality. He, instead, wants to promote the fact that the restaurant is becoming kosher-free by having the cows wear cheese hats on their heads. The popular slogan “Eat Mor Chikin” will also be changed to show the proper spelling of the words. Chick-fil-a has flourished over the years and is now able to hire a more educated advertising team. That is not the only modification. There will be a new pig mascot that will serve as the sidekick to the cows. He will have his own slogan: “Bacon is BAAAAD” (yeah…the whole education thing is a work in progress). Rubenstein is adding the pig to once again show respect towards those who follow Judaism’s kosher requirement.
The new Chick-fil-a will make its debut on the sunset of Saturday April 7th, which is the official conclusion of Passover. Until then the world eagerly awaits for the world’s greatest fast food chains to get even better.